Last night we tried something new. Something we had never needed to do before or ever planned to do. We took it for granted that our Churches would always be open! Although we have always immensely valued the Domestic Church, we had never imagined that it was going to be (at least for a time) the exclusive centre of our Faith.
So here we are with a community of people, small and big, depending on us parents, to guide them through this desert, holding on to us, holding on to the Faith passed onto to us from our parents, knowing that “where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.” – Matthew 18:20
As it was Friday in Lent we would have attended the "Stations of the Cross' devotion in the Parish...Instead we put up our handmade stations around the house, beginning in the kitchen and ending in the little girls’ bedroom, and set off on a journey around our domestic Jerusalem.
The younger children learnt the responses and Pierpaolo, - the Bishop of the Domestic Church- led the liturgy and sang the verses from the Stabat Mater.
Lucia held a candle in front of each station as we moved through the house.
It was a beautiful moment of prayer and one we’ll do again on Good Friday.
How we made the Stations of the Cross:
I wanted something easy for the children to put together, something they needed little help to do but where the final result would be nice and tidy! So as we had been learning about Stained Glass window techniques I thought that kind of pattern could work.
I ordered some downloadable patterns and we started this project hoping for a good result as well as finally learning the order of the Stations.
We printed the pattern to fit an A4 Sheet and the children then traced the image with a black Sharpie onto (let's call it side B) of a piece of tracing paper.
We tested a great number of types of paint but decided that children's liquid Acrylics worked best. We also painted on side B
It took the girls a very long time to paint them all, and everyone - or most of us - had to, at some point, help with the painting as we had to finish them in time for our family liturgy (so make sure to give yourself 3 days to complete this project or a whole afternoon with no interruptions).
Once the the paint was dry, we turned the pictures over to the side you are meant to see (Side A) and I applied a very thin layer of gold leaf glue to the halos and swords and after a few seconds applied gold leaf to each picture (Gold paint would also work). I did the same with swords using Silver leaf instead. This really lifted the pictures and brought the colours to life.
We cut the pictures following the circle of the pattern and glued them onto some brown card, I had laying around, where we had pre cut a smaller circle than the picture to allow light to come through the tracing paper from the back.
Elena, wrote the number of each station directly below the picture on the brown card with a Gold Sharpie. We then applied gold leaf on the Roman Numerals as well as the borders, once again, applying a very thin layer of glue, waiting for a few seconds and applying the leaf with the intent to have an 'antique look' of Gold coming off and missing in some parts.
The Family Liturgy was very moving and because it wasn't static and was done by candlelight the younger ones found it fascinating.
We started from the kitchen, at the heart of our domestic life, and went around the downstairs rooms then up the stairs to calvary. We strategically finished the procession in the yourger children's bedroom, naturally accompanying them to bed.
The girls were put in bed, the candle was blown out and we experienced a sort of bitter sweet joy, longing for something we never knew would be hidden from us for a time.
A couple of months ago when yet another great YouTube video from Fr Schmitz was shared on the Catholic Mothers' wall I said to myself... 'He is the next on my list! I am going to interview him on behalf of my Mothers group!'
Although I was sure he'd be too busy I tried. God granted for this to happen through the help of a great friend and thanks to Fr Mike's kindness.
As a mother of two growing boys I always wonder where God will lead them and what He will ask of them as men. I pray for them, as I do for all our children, that they may say Yes to God when he calls and that they may respond positively to whatever plan He has for them.
Our duty as parents is to lay the foundations of our children's Faith so that growing up they will clearly recognise the voice of the Lord and will leave their nets to follow Him to whatever He asks of them.
A phrase that Pope St Pius X said often comes to my mind: 'A vocation comes from the heart of God, but goes through the heart of the mother'.
Whenever we watch and listen to any of Fr Mike's YouTube videos with my children, my sons especially are full of admiration for him, as for me, all I can think of is how blessed his mother must be.
In the Interview below, Fr Mike Schmitz, answers some of the questions our Catholic Mothers from around the world asked him about his own vocation, the role that his family and in particular his mother played in his vocation and much more.
In our virtual conversation I was touched by Fr Mike's openness, humility and willingness to serve a stranger... I'm full of gratitude to Fr Schmitz for taking the time to give me this interview and share his insights on making a home that nurtures the next generation of priests!
All of this week a Symposium is taking place in Barcelona in preparation for next year's Synod on Young People. The theme is "Accompanying Young People to freely respond to Christ's call." It's organised by the Council of European Bishops Conferences.
We were contacted by the Vice President the extraordinarily dynamic Dutch priest Michel Remery and author of a great book of apologetics for young people: Tweeting With God.
He wanted a 5 minute video of a family with children of various ages, talking about accompanying young people in faith and discovering their vocation. That seemed easy enough but if you're ever doing a video, leave at least five times as much time as you think you need!
We were on a tight deadline and finished the video after about 100 takes, at 2:30am talking about the joys of family life and wanting to strangle eachother!
We had so much more we would have wanted to say and say better but we think we managed to get something of value across... you decide!
Yesterday while the family was having dinner together, as usual, Elena told us that her teacher had asked her whether it was true that we spent about an hour around the dinner table every day... Then turning towards me she asked "Why mum... doesn't every family do that?... it is so natural (meaning normal) to do it?" She was genuinely surprised to hear that it's quite rare for families to eat together on a weeknight.
Cooking dinner and having a good meal together is time consuming and requires a lot of effort and forward planning. You learn lots of shortcuts and little tricks but it takes time and practice.
Elena is right, it comes very 'natural' to us and it is possible because of the choices we made like very few activities in the evening and jobs that allow us to spend time together though they will never make us millionaires =).
The dinner table is one of the 3 altars of Marriage , it is where many important moments of our life are shared, it is where communion among the family is acquired, empathy is nurtured and most importantly it is where faith is passed on. It is also where we are brought together for a moment of rest at the end of a usually hectic day.
Jesus Himself did much of his preaching around the dinner table... and was lunching here, there and everywhere with sinners, tax collectors and pharisees... (I always knew Jesus was Italian ;-).
Now that the great feast of Christmas is coming the entire family will get together, we will sit (and fit) around a dinner table that grows to meet the grandeur of Jesus's birth. Like last year we will hire a marquee, which we refer to as the 'Tent of Eating', as our houses in London don't have big enough dining rooms to accommodate us all, the table will be beautifully laid, songs and praises will be raised to Heaven, experiences retold, good wine drunk, carefully prepared food shared and enjoyed all in honour of King... and the time spent around the dinner table will start on the 24th and will last for 12 days!
As the time of big dinners approaches to find the right recipe for the right occasion can be quite tricky and your memory goes when looking for an idea. I feel your pain... to help you alleviate your suffering 'The Zelie Group' has put together a little collection of recipes. Here are 3, follow the links below to download/save them all.
Christmas music is all around us,
decorations are to be found in every shop and the premature festive spirits
seems to have been imposed on us once again by the consumerist society we live
in. Every year Christmas seems to start earlier. At least now that Halloween is
getting bigger we know it means that Christmas can’t start before the 1st of
November but that seems to be as good as it’s going to get.
1.Have an eschatological Advent
Advent is a game of two halves, the first
15 days look forward to the second coming of Christ in glory at the end of time
and the last nine days (novena) looks forward to Jesus’s birth. Use the Sunday
readings to speak about the second coming. Are we looking forward to it or are
we afraid? Do we say Maranatha (come Lord Jesus) or not yet?
2.Advent traditions
Advent is a time of waiting, watching,
preparing. There needs to be a sense of anticipation of ‘we’re not there yet - but
soon’. The Advent wreath is helpful, keep the candles lit whenever the family
is together. Advent calendars work as well. When you put up the family crib
make sure Jesus is left out until after midnight Mass. Ideally the house should
be decorated in earnest after the 16th when the focus shifts from
the second coming at the end of time to the first coming in Bethlehem.
3.The weapons of Advent Prayer, fasting and almsgiving are the
three weapons that the Church gives us to help us to defeat the world, the
flesh and the devil. Lent and Advent are special times for us to do battle to
purify ourselves in readiness for Christ’s coming. It’s a time to increase the
intensity of our prayer. We’re planning to teach a new Marian prayer to our
children, the Alma Redemptoris Mater a lesser known prayer than the Salve
Regina but one the Church has said during Advent and Christmas for a thousand
years.
4.Celebrate all twelve days of Christmas
Fasting
is hard but sometimes feasting seems even more difficult. At Easter the Church asks
us to feast for 50 days so 12 should be a doddle. However, when you’ve been
celebrating as if it’s Christmas from some time in November then by the time
Christmas actually starts it’s all getting a bit boring. So hold something back
for those twelve days, we always ensure that certain types of food cannot be
touched until Christmas has really started. In our house Panettone and Pandoro
are off limits until the 25th. Make time for your family throughout
from Christmas to Epiphany. Keep the decorations looking beautiful. Eat dinner
from your best china, light a candle when you have dinner, whatever your
favourite Christmas treats are make sure you have enough to keep you going. The
Church gives us some amazingly rich feasts during that period, the Holy Family,
the Holy Innocents, Mary Mother of God celebrate them all! Is it all a bit
much? Well it’s a birthday unlike any other, the birth of our Saviour, of God
incarnate so whatever celebration we canplan is less than it deserves.
The Siena Sisters CWBN (Catholic Women Blogger Network) posts will be live on the 3rd Tuesday of each month.
For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
There he was walking down the aisle, a grown man ready to become a husband, a man ready to take the hands of his lovely bride and walk together before God: my little brother. There she was, married, with her three children, sitting behind me worrying around her boys being slightly noisy during the mass: my little sister. There I was a wife, a mother of six beautiful children, praising the Lord for the miracles he has worked. I was there at the beginning, the shouts, the tears, the broken plates, the slammed doors, the walking out and the fear that things would never improve and that one parent or the other would not come back... the horrible silences after the huge storms, the suffering each one of us had to endure and bear individually and as a family. In this world that is constantly trying to avoid pain and tribulations the answer for such a dysfunctional family would have been to dismantle it, to break it apart and I can guarantee you the temptation to think like that was at times very strong. The answer is in Christ, it was from Him that strength was drawn, it was from Him that hope came, it was through the ugliness of the Cross that we all knew life and fullness of joy had been won for us. Yes it was ugly, yes it was hard and the suffering was immense at times while growing up, but it was in that very situation that we all met Christ, where we all discovered TRUE love, a love that forgives beyond forgiveness, a love that can give even when you think you have nothing left to give, a love that has endless strength to love.
Seeing my brother walk down the aisle was incredibly moving and seeing all of us embracing marriage with no fear was yet another victory of Christ. Through my parents' marriage, God spoke very clearly to us, He spoke of its indissolubility, He gave us His Mother to call upon and her Son who miraculously provided the sweet wine of Cana. I was not afraid when I got married, the past was the past and Jesus himself said he came to make everything new... there was no fear in my sister when she pronounced her yes, she knew in Him there is life and life was what she was looking for. As my brother walked towards the altar there was no doubt in him that his marriage would be a success: He took his bride and together they happily started their journey towards Christ.
By Ettore (aged 16) It was year 10 (I was 14) and with the start of my RE GCSE course, debate consequently followed. Complex issues like abortion, euthanasia and the death penalty were brought forward with arguments for and against and our opinion was sought. Even in a Catholic school I often found myself in a minority, defending not only Catholic teaching but the right side of the argument. What I failed to take into account was that I was not in a room full of rookie debate partners with vague ideas of their opinion, I was in a room full of pro-choicers using classic pro-choice talking points like: 'what about the woman's choice?' 'what if a twelve year old was raped and became pregnant?' and 'what if the mother's life was in danger?' All simple questions to respond to; if you are well informed, but at the time, I wasn't... I was stopped dead in my tracks and destroyed in debate, and made to look and sound like the crazy person in the room. What I did not realise was that education and the media was a highly effective pro-choice brainwashing centre, which luckily had not affected me as my family and belief in God had created strong defences. Sad about my defeat I left questioning my opinions, and once I came to the conclusion that I was on the right side I decided to do something about it. I knew abortion was wrong but I could not express it in a way that was scientific and well thought out and backed up by solid arguments. So I hit the books, the only way to get well informed was to find a book that taught me how to debate, and I was fortunate enough to be listening to Catholic Answers when the book 'Persuasive pro life' was advertised, a book which I will also advertise for any people aspiring to defend life. It was the answer to my prayers. I sat down to read and learn from the book, and can safely say I spent more time studying that book than for my RE GCSE! The book was truly a blessing as it went clearly through the arguments, talking points and examples of what a debate could and should look like from an experienced pro lifer, Trent Horn. I learnt it cover to cover and came back to the school debates as a force to be reckoned with. However I only realised later that debates which contain such emotion should not be approached in the same way as other debates where you make a fool out of your opponent by hitting them with great points and facts (not to say you don't use facts and talking points) but these debates are not won by a single argument in which you intellectually outdo your opponent, but the aim is to plant seeds. Usually just the fact that someone dares to question the Status Quo is a start, and then when you show them you are not just a religious nut with even nuttier opinions, but that you use science and facts then you really have something going. You won't change views over night, or you might never, but you must not feel like you've ever won an argument, because that is not what these debates are about. You must slowly show someone your view, gently and calmly as your opponent will almost never be, wiping the floor with a pro-choicer who had previously had an abortion is not the best tactic or the most loving Christian thing to do. This was hard for a head strong (or arrogant as I have been called by a great many people!) person like myself to just go easy on someone who was making excuses for murder, but the book taught me to practise what I preach, and be compassionate to the pro-choicer and let your loving view be expressed also in how you treat the pro-choicer. But this was just the beginning...
I decided to start a pro-life group in my parish, which was advertised in the church's newsletter as a Profile group (AUTO CORRECT IS SO ANNOYING!) And I was given a helping hand by SPUC's own Rhoslyn Thomas, she started off the group with a brilliant presentation on the gravity of the situation and the necessity of us as citizens to get involved and fight the greatest evil of the 20th and 21th century. The presentation was followed by questions and then food as things usually do when hosted in an italian-Catholic household. We continued to meet for debate practice using the Persuasive Pro life book to structure these and fought the assisted suicide bill in the UK by leafleting around my area and speaking to neighbours to write to our MP. This first contact with SPUC led to me doing work experience with them for two weeks in June 2015. There I saw truly good people who gave up careers that would offer wealth on earth and followed one that offered immense wealth in heaven. I wrote blog posts for them did some side walk counseling training to prepare me for going outside of a Marie Stopes abortion clinic in central London, by far one of the most depressing things I've ever done. Im not going to sugar coat it. This is the perfect place for the devil to get at you and convince you it's hopeless and that you're fighting a losing battle, as you see woman after woman walk into the clinic and ignore the aid of the sidewalk counsellor. You must be strong. Now I don't want to dissuade you from doing it as we need all the help we can get, but don't go there unprepared. Pray the rosary, don't let the devil get to you. After my experience at SPUC my desire to defend life was greatly increased. Now my views have only grown stronger and although due to school work I cannot currently participate in pro-life work as much as I would like to, I do what I can, and if it involves challenging the teacher, student or friends who make outrageous anti-life statements I dont let them get away with it and think that their opinion is the accepted truth. My government and politics class will be very interesting when it comes to the debate stages as students have already affirmed their pro-choice views with no contestation and said how being pro-life is, in the words of one of my peers 'like so old fashioned.' (I didn't know scientific fact went out of fashion, but what would I know about science, i'm just a bigoted catholic!) So I would like to end by saying this: even if you don't have a lot of time to commit to the pro-life cause, buy Persuasive Pro Life, learn the arguments and challenge people, the best thing you can do is to be informed. And in the words of Trent Horn... plant seeds.
Catholic women bloggers all across the world are publishing posts today on some of the unsung heroes and defenders of the most vulnerable members of society: the unborn. Here's the story of a group doing amazing work in the heart of London.
Although never actively involved in the pro-life movement we've always been a pro-life family. That only changed in 2014 when our eldest son Ettore found himself in a pro life minority at his Catholic school so he started researching arguments and talking points so that he could enter prepared into debates to defend life.
Ettore spent two weeks of work experience at the Society for the Protection of the Unborn Child and he also had the privilege of spending a few afternoons praying the rosary outside abortion clinics .
His first experience outside those facilities was very strong and sitting around the dinner table, the talkative Ettore was left speechless. He brought home the suffering of the women that entered those doors of death. The natural next step was to get in contact with pro-life organizations and see how to help.
Among the Pro Life Organizations in London one in particular came to our attention: the 'Good Counsel Network'.
The big abortion providers in the UK like BPAS and Marie Stopes have plenty of visibility in doctor's surgeries and hospitals while the kind of work done by the Good Counsel Network lies hidden and goes on quietly and constantly saving as many lives as possible.
"Abortion kills twice. It kills the body of the baby and it kills the conscience of the mother. Abortion is profoundly anti-women. Three quarters of its victims are women: Half the babies and all the mothers."
~ Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta ~
Last week despite being in the middle of some vitriolic attacks from the UK national media Clare McCullough one of the founders of the Good Counsel Network found the time to answer some of the questions I've always wanted to ask her.
What inspired you to set up the good counsel network?
A
man I met who was doing this work in Dublin, Eamonn Murphy. He came over to the UK to show us what he was doing in Ireland. Once I saw how he was reaching out to
women I knew I wanted to be involved. At first I waited for someone else to
start it so I could help! But finally he set it up really and dropped it into
my lap. I knew if I didn’t start working on it, it was just going to fizzle out
and I couldn’t bear that happening.
What is the most common reason for a woman to present herself for an abortion?
We see all sorts of reasons. Lots of illegal immigrants with no papers, no rights to work, no rights to housing or benefits and in the UK most people think that “everyone” gets housing and benefits if they are in need. Little do people realise most of these women do not even qualify for help at homeless shelters and so we regularly take 8 month pregnant women off the street. Others arefleeing domestic violence or family disapproval. Many come because they are not in a stable relationship. But if I have to name the one common factor, it is contraception. Even the UK’s two major abortion chains say that about half their “clients” are using contraception when their unplanned pregnancy occurs. Are more Catholics presenting themselves for abortion than one would expect?
There
are too many Catholic women that we see. I think at first I was shocked to see
how many Catholics were looking for abortions. But now I completely understand
that Catholics have had very poor teaching on sexual morality and respect for
life and general catechesis has been poor, at least throughout the West, for
some time now. Naturally this leads to people living as they have been taught.
The weak passing on of the Church’s teaching on contraception is a huge problem
in this regard too. Unfortunately many other Christians are also aborting in
large numbers. But we think it’s a blessing when God sends these ladies to us
and we have a chance to offer alternatives. "Once that living love is destroyed by contraception, abortion follows very easily." ~ Bl. Mother Teresa ~
What is the average age of people presenting themselves from abortion?
In our centre 25-35 is about the average age. But nationally it varies. Young single women from the early teens and up are very vulnerable to abortion. Schoolgirls can have their abortion booked for them by the school nurse and be referred straight away for abortion with no parent being informed.
If you could say one thing to somebody considering abortion what
would it be?
If
the person had any belief in God, I would say, “Please pray about your
decision. Stop for a moment and consider why God has sent this child into your
life now. You may think he or she is a “mistake”, people make mistakes, but God
does not make mistakes.” – it is important that believers recognise that God is
giving them a mission in their life, to be a mother. But whether or not she
believes in God it would be important to build up her self esteem – encouraging
her by helping her see that she can do this – respect her child’s life and
achieve the things she wants to achieve in life, and then putting her in touch
with good, solid support. If she really feels she cannot take on raising her
child, we must also be able to help her compassionately to find life-respecting
choices such as giving her child up for adoption.
When women turn away
from abortion at the door of an abortion centre, 9 out of ten of them say “Well,
I prayed about my decision and then when I turned up I met Jane”[or some pro-life volunteer]. Many of these
women don’t know for sure if they even believe in God. But their prayer seems to be
heard anyway.
What is and what could be the father’s role in all of this?
The father is the missing person most of the time. He is often the reason for the abortion – if he says he doesn’t want the baby the chances of her aborting soar. Some men do come in with the woman, but often just to make sure the abortion happens. Occasionally we see men who desperately want the woman to keep the baby. Of course we support them and advise them in every way, but legally he has no say in her decision – so if he cannot persuade her to keep the baby she will have the abortion. Like women, men need to realise contraception is nowhere near 100% effective in the real world. And if the woman is open to abortion he needs to consider that before he risks a sexual relationship. Once she is pregnant, he will have to be able to address her fears about him or his commitment to her if she is dubious about having the baby. Instead he needs to make a commitment to her (i.e.Marriage) before risking sex and in preparing for that commitment, discover whether or not she and he share an unconditional respect for life.
What kind of practical help do you offer to women once they've decided to keep the baby?
We try to be directed by the Mother as to her real needs. We let her say “If I just had this or that I would cope”. In reality the help is mainly financial help, housing, moral support, legal or medical advice, maternity clothes, a place to hide, help with childcare, baby goods, ongoing counselling. But we are not limited to that and can provide help “outside the box” if the mother-to-be has an unusual request but we can see it would genuinely help.
Can you tell us about one experience that you think back to when
things don't seem to be going so well?
This
work is a continual spiritual battle and in a certain sense things never seem
to be going well, because we often seem to lurch from one crisis (financial
crisis, practical problems) to another (media attacks and so on). But we are so
blessed to see so many women who were once set on abortion keeping their
babies, You have a terrible day, where no-one wants your help or girls in awful
situations get forced into abortions and you feel like you want to give up.
Then you walk out of the counselling room into the reception and there are 3
women with their babies who you remember were in equally awful situations last
year. And the annual Christmas party where we see dozens and dozens of mums we
have been blessed to assist. Also having Mass and Adoration in our Centre each
day really helps us. These things keep you going.
What would you say to people who think that pavement counselling
is judgemental towards women in a difficult moment for life?
I
would say “Go there and see for yourself” Go and see the way these women go in
and how they come out. See women being dragged in there, literally sometimes,
with no advocate on their side. Pope John Paul II said It is not right that
they should be left alone. In the UK, the old model of reaching women via
pregnancy testing and Crisis Pregnancy Centres is dead. Ask your local
pregnancy centre and if they are honest they will tell you they are seeing
almost no-one. As in the UK abortion is mostly free and you can get almost
immediate appointments, anyone with the slightest doubts about their pregnancy
can be shepherded to abortion centres before they have had time to think. We have
actually had to call the police to help women inside the abortion centres who
are calling us from the toilets because they are being pressured by others to
abort! We have recently put some video testimonies of women who we have helped
on the doorsteps of abortion centres on our website www.goodcounselnetwork.comPlease listen to them and then you will
understand why we are there.
How can people
support the 'Good Counsel Network’?
In so many ways! Firstly praying for our work is key. We
believe it is a spiritual battle we are fighting. Secondly, financially.
Supporting mothers in need is an expensive business. Thirdly by volunteering,
maybe coming to pray at Adoration in our Centre (in Central London) or helping
with the work in the Centre, or by volunteering at one of the prayer vigils
outside an abortion centre. You can sign up for any of these options on our
website. And you can sign up for regular texts about women we are praying for
that especially need your help. http://www.goodcounselnetwork.com/
